Tucker Carlson appeared at a Donald Trump rally in Duluth, Georgia on Wednesday, and it didn’t take long for him to make things creepy.
The former Fox News host made a weird speech in which he tried to compare America to a household with misbehaving children, saying, “If you allow your hormone-addled 15-year-old daughter to slam her door in your face and give you the finger, you’re gonna get more of it.”
“Everything at home OK, Tuck?” asks Colbert on The Late Show, before quickly launching into a Carlson impression. “If you allow your kids to wait until you fall asleep on the couch and then draw a penis on your forehead with a sharpie, and when you ask ‘Who did this?’ they just laugh and say ‘Oh my God the penis just got a vein in it because dad is so angry,’ and if you say ‘There will be consequences,’ then you fall and bang your actual penis on the edge of the coffee table because they tied your shoes together, and you’re so startled you let out a big fart, and then your wife starts laughing too, and then they film it all and post it online and now you’re going viral as #penisfartdad, then I’m telling you, I’m telling you, you’re gonna get more of it.”
Unfortunately Carlson’s speech only got weirder from there, as he went on to repeatedly compare Trump to an angry father coming home give his daughter “a vigorous spanking,” in a metaphor for America we won’t soon forget.
“Dad is pissed,” Carlson said on Wednesday. “And when dad gets home, you know what he says? ‘You’ve been a bad girl. You’ve been a bad little girl, and you’re getting a vigorous spanking right now.'”
Back on The Late Show, Colbert wondered, “I just can’t figure out why they’re having trouble appealing to female voters.”
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Stephen Colbert
Politics
