As Americans continue to struggle with rising grocery prices in Donald Trump’s economy, the White House is offering up some groundbreaking “tips” for saving money at meal times. In a widely derided interview, agriculture secretary Brooke Rollins suggested families could both adhere to the Trump administration’s new dietary guidelines and only spend $3 on a meal consisting of “a piece of chicken, a piece of broccoli, you know, a corn tortilla, and one other thing.”
“I love to sit down for dinner with my family and dig into a healthy plate that consists of one piece of chicken, one piece of broccoli, one corn tortilla, and because we’re f***ing rolling in it, one other thing,” responded Seth Meyers on Late Night on Thursday. “That list is so bad I’m guessing the ‘one other thing’ is a single French fry you have to wrestle away from a pigeon in a McDonald’s parking lot.
“Seriously, ‘one piece of chicken, one piece of broccoli, and one corn tortilla’ is your recommendation to Americans for what they should eat. That sounds like a meal aliens would bring to your cell after they abduct you. ‘Please enjoy some of your Earth foods. You will need your strength for the probing.'”
Meyers also pointed out that Rollins said her team ran “over 1,000 simulations” to come up with this novel $3 meal idea.
“I’m sorry, you had to run over 1,000 simulations to add up the cost of three grocery items? Don’t use the computer for that! That’s not what the computer is for!” he said. “Also, what do you mean ‘it can cost $3′ — in how many of the simulations did it cost more? ‘In one simulation, there was a corn virus, and the chickens ate the corn, and all the chickens died, and it was like a million dollars.'”
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Late Night With Seth Meyers
