As any hardcore fan — stan — of a famous musician or actor knows, they also have haters. “Antis,” if you will. As it turns out, Valentine’s Day is no different.
Love Day is almost here, and your algorithm might be spitting up videos about the best restaurants to go to, recipes to try, or gifts to shower your loved one with. Or, it might be showing you the opposite: posts railing against Valentine’s Day, and even events celebrating “anti Valentine’s Day.”
Why are some people anti-Valentine’s Day?
“For a lot of people, Valentine’s Day represents old or stale values, like heteronormativity, the commercialization of love, this sort of monogonormativity of it all,” sex therapist and founder of therapy practice The Expansive Group, Casey Tanner, told Mashable.
“It makes total sense to me that the sort of response to that is, ‘Why not create some community around that experience, instead of only centering people who are on the relationship escalator?'” Tanner said.
According to recent YouGov data, only 37 percent of 1,114 U.S. adults surveyed plan to celebrate Valentine’s Day, and only 52 percent in a romantic or sexual relationship do, too.
February 14 can be isolating if you’re single, and it also props up romantic and sexual relationships as superior to platonic ones. (Maybe you celebrate Galentine’s Day instead to buck this notion.)
Anti-Valentine’s Day festivities
Amanda Badeau, founder of bookstore, cafe, and wine bar The Archive in South Carolina, told Mashable she puts a lot of pressure on herself to be unique and perfect, especially around holidays. Valentine’s Day carries a lot of pressure, and she also mentioned it can be isolating. Instead of forcing a more “traditional” event, The Archive is hosting a “Shred Your Ex” anti-Valentine’s Day night instead.
Badeau wanted to take a lighthearted approach and create an event that felt inclusive, supportive, and relatable (and just a bit petty). “Shred Your Ex grew out of the idea of turning a moment that’s often heavy or awkward into something communal, a little playful and empowering,” she added.
Mashable Trend Report
In addition to having shredders at the ready, Badeau and the all-female staff team are also putting on “red flag bingo.”
The reaction so far has been overwhelmingly enthusiastic, Badeau said. “We’ve heard from customers who feel relieved to see an event that acknowledges heartbreak and singlehood with humor instead of pressure, and a lot of individuals are already planning to come with friends — which is exactly the kind of energy we hoped for.”
Meanwhile, over in New York, the Bronx Zoo is holding its 15th annual Name a Roach initiative. For $15, you can symbolically name one of the zoo’s thousands of Madagascar hissing cockroaches.
Executive director of membership and digital at the Wildlife Conservation Society and the team lead for Name a Roach, Debbie Schneiderman, told Mashable that, given roaches’ longevity, most people name one for someone they love, like their partner or child. “But we do get a fair number” that name a roach after their exes or people they like…less than their partner or child.
“The majority are sent with love,” Schneiderman said.
But even naming a roach after your beloved isn’t the same as buying flowers. In 2026, people might want to celebrate Valentine’s Day differently. The day has historically been a test for relationships, Tanner said, like using the caliber of the gift to gauge how much value your partner gives you.
Anti-Valentine’s Day is “also a rejection of using any one day to make a value judgment about somebody’s life, somebody’s relationship,” she said.
“It’s an anti-capitalist move,” Tanner said of anti-Valentine’s Day. “It’s a rejection of the pressure to buy into a particular script, or to be sold on the marketing of it all.”
“More people start to see behind the curtain of why days like this exist, and sort of understand the ways that we’ve been tricked into commercializing love,” Tanner continued. She compared this to how people question days like New Year’s, when we now know that many cultures celebrate the beginning of a new year at different times.
If you’re into Valentine’s Day, there are a lot of pink and red hearts out there for you. But if your style is more black this Saturday, there’s room for that as well.
