Pete Hegseth performs slam poetry in ‘SNL’s Cold Open

Saturday Night Live took the United States’ upcoming midterm elections as an opportunity to break out several of its impressions of key members of the Republican party.

In its Oct. 3 cold open, staffers of the Republican National Committee (Andrew Dismukes and Ashley Padilla) invite Republican politicians to film ads telling their base to get out and vote. First up is Secretary of State Marco Rubio (Marcello Hernandez), who delivers an impassioned speech in Spanish about how Trump “tricked” everyone, including him. Then comes a wheelchair-bound Senator Mitch McConnell (Mikey Day), who throws up a peace sign and almost cuts the cold open short with an ill-timed “Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night!”

After a brief appearance by Vice President JD Vance (Jeremy Culhane), whose ad (and presidential ambitions) are hastily dismissed, the cold open dials up the dude bro aggression with the appearance of Colin Jost’s Pete Hegseth. He chugs Bero (“Spider-Man’s new non-alcoholic bitch beer”) and levels some insults at the audience (“schlong donkeys”) before commanding everyone to “do the gayest thing ever and vote.” Things take a turn for the surreal when he breaks into some strange slam poetry, complete with bongos, homophobia, and transphobia.

Of course, it wouldn’t be a 2026 SNL cold open without an appearance from James Austin Johnson’s President Trump, who’s ready to deny any election results that don’t go his party’s way. Bleak! But at least the bongos are fun.